I guess it is time for another update... :)

I am so behind on here! Hopefully I can remember enough about the past few months to post on here. Ellie started crawling the right way when she was 8 months old. Very shortly after she started crawling she started pulling herself up onto things. I really hated it when she first started standing up. I had to be right beside her all of the time so that she wouldn't fall and hurt herself. She eventually learned a better way to get down. She would slowly put her hands on the floor then drop her knee's onto the floor. It was pretty cute. It looked like she was doing a yoga pose. She eventually got tired of doing that and started to drop onto her bottom. I wish I had updated this much sooner because there are a lot of things that I can't remember :(

During her 10th month she really started to try to talk. She will say "hi", "Buh" for bye, "MOM" mainly when she is upset and needs me to get her something, and "Dada". Ellie and I went on a short trip to Twin Falls and while at our Aunt Bitsy's house, Bitsy and her daughter got her to say "puppy" twice! I honestly couldn't believe that she said it! I haven't been able to get her to repeat it though. It would probably help if we had a puppy here. Now I will have a little buddy to help me persuade Steven to get a puppy :). She absolutely LOVES animals! When we were in Twin Falls, Ellie chased the cat at my moms how all over the place. The cat ended up trying to hide most of the time. Ellie was never able to catch her. I'm thinking that she will get the cat one of these days.

I basically NEVER get to go the the bathroom by myself. She always follows me into our bathroom. She loves trying to get the toilet paper to unroll it. She likes it even more when she actually gets to it which has happened a couple of times.

Ellie really likes to push my buttons! Seriously, every button I have that she can reach gets pushed. The buttons on the T.V., the button that turns the computer on and off, the buttons on the remote control's, the buttons on the VCR/DVD player and the buttons on the keyboard. I think that it is one of her new favorite things to do.

She really loves her toys. She pushes balls all over the apartment. She will usually pick out a certain toy or other random object during the day and will drag it with her and talk to it most of the day. It's pretty cute. I think that her favorite toys right now are her dolly, her toy remote control, and her rattles.

She also loves books. Her favorite book is The Foot Book, by Dr. Seuss. If I want her to come to me and she try's to ignore me all I have to do is start reading, or reciting in my case, that book and she'll come right to me. Her other favorite is the book Mirror Me. It's a Baby Einstein book. It makes her smile every time we read it to her. She really is happy with any book though.

She loves playing peek-a-boo games. Her favorite is when I hide in another room or behind something and say "where's Ellie". She always comes to me and when I see her she gets a big smile on her face and seems so excited that I found her. She also thinks it's pretty funny when I cover her face with a blanket and say the same thing. She will pull it down and smile, then pull it over her face again.

We have recently found that she can stand without holding on to anything. A lot of the time I don't think she notices that she is standing by herself. Usually as soon as she notices she sits down. Today she has been brave and has stood up and let go of me by herself. She has been walking along all of our furniture for a while. She can also push her little infant toy stroller around. I'm thinking that she'll be walking on her own in no time. I am a little nervous for that. She already keeps me on my toes as she is!

Ellie has really become a social butterfly. She is so happy when she see's new people, especially kids and other babies. She usually follows babies close to her age around when she can. She usually copies what they are doing and thinks that they are so great.

I'm not sure what her favorite food is right now. She will eat almost anything we give to her. She usually eats whatever we eat for dinner and lunch. It is fun to see her all messy and covered in food, I just wish it was fun to clean her up too!

Things she hates are getting her face cleaned, the dreaded nasal aspirator, getting things taken away from her (sometimes I have to do it), going for long rides in the car, public restrooms (she FREAKS out when a toilet flushes), and she doesn't seem to like getting a new diaper put on her.

It is crazy how quickly she is growing up. Next month I will be posting about her 1st birthday party. While it is exciting, it makes me sad too. This year has gone way too fast! Sorry for the super long post! I'll try to do a better job at keeping up on my blog.

Crazy mommy

After having Ellie I haven't really been myself. I knew that after having her I would have the "baby blues" for a little while, but it wasn't supposed to last this long. I am constantly worrying about Ellie. While that is normal, some of the things I worry about are just silly. A majority of the time I am just sure something bad is going to happen. Every time we leave the house I think that we will get into a car accident, or a crazy stranger will try to kidnap and harm Ellie. I have a hard time sleeping at night because I think that someone is going to break into our apartment. I am also terrified of SIDS, even though she is much older now. There are a lot of times I have mild panic attacks.

I have also been extremely sad and unmotivated. I have always struggled a little with my self esteem, but it has gotten much worse. I can't get rid of the idea that nobody wants to be around me. I have done a pretty good job at secluding myself. Every once in a while my sisters-in-law will invite me over for a get together, but other than that I stay in my apartment. During the summer I made myself get outside and walk, but now that is cold I have no desire to go anywhere. It is hard to make myself get a lot of things done. I am always feeling like I'm such a failure because I don't do all of the things that I should do. It seems like it should be so easy to do stuff, but it really isn't most of the time. I have also noticed that I have been EXTREMELY irritable. I feel like I am mad about something most of the time, which really isn't like me. My husband does a great job taking care of Ellie, but there are a lot of times I am just so angry at him.

I have been trying to handle all of my feelings by myself for a long time, but last week my husband made an appointment for me to see my doctor for depression. I had to fill out a couple of questionnaires and I scored extremely high for anxiety and depression. I have since started taking a medication. I am really hoping that it will help! I can't stand feeling the way that I have been.

If anyone reading this has any pointers on how to get out of this feel free to comment! I really hope I can get out of this slump.

More pictures just cuz she's cute!

I just wanted to post a few recent pictures!

Ellie found my sister-in-law's workout videos. Don't worry Debra, they are safe now!

My favorite facial expression Ellie makes.

So tired!

Funny expression

Almost crawling!

Last Wednesday I was sitting at the computer desk while Ellie was in the middle of the room happily playing with her toys. It was a huge surprise when I turned my head to check on her and she was slowly inching her way next to me! She really wanted to play with the exersaucer, which was next to me. Since then she has really taken off. She is getting on her hands and knee's and really trying to crawl. She does get around pretty good by scooting though.

I hope you don't mind my baby talk :). For some reason my voice gets more high pitched and my English get's really bad. I know it's supposed to be I'm sorry, not "I sorry".


Just a side note, I had moved her toy back when she got upset in the video.

Teeth!

The weekend before Christmas Ellie was extremely fussy. I thought that she may have possibly been teething, but I had been thinking that every time she got fussy for the pas 3 months! This time I was right. Her first tooth cut through her gums just a couple of days before Christmas. She was so much happier! This week her second front bottom tooth came in. I have a feeling that we are going to be seeing more soon.